Since 2000, this colourful bunch have been rattling around in my head, growing and evolving, while all the time inspiring and entertaining me. After 340 cartoon strips, a couple of calendars, then a hiatus where we fell out of touch, I’ve come to appreciate just how much they’ve also inspired and entertained the people important to me. A lot’s changed since we last had the lid off the pot, so I thought it was time we got to know each other again.

Hemi
Hemi’s gone from a cheeky schoolboy with a razor sharp wit – who loved food and video games – to a married man with triplet sons, who still loves food, but has less time for video games. With or without his trademark beanie, his eyes are always hidden under a thick crop of jet black hair. He and his wife have taken on the homestead at his Uncle’s farm, where Hemi’s been working to tidy things up. He hasn’t decided yet if the country life is really for him, but having a few large paddocks for the boys to run around in, has helped keep him sane, for now at least.
First appeared: 2000 #001

Huia

She’s the only woman who can keep Hemi in line. As if having three young sons wasn’t enough to fill her days, this no-nonsense wife and mother is a school-teacher and runs the household after work while Hemi helps to fix up his uncle’s farm – she’s the one who ought to be doing it, being a country girl. It’s just as well she’s tough, doesn’t mind getting her hands dirty and – most importantly – has a sense of humour!
First Appeared: 2014 #001B (and calendar).

Luana
Hemi’s school friend. Despite being constantly exasperated by his chauvinistic views and lax attitude to his schoolwork, Luana was one of Hemi’s best friends and his comic foil. Her older brother – a pilot – died when she was just a baby, her older sister Erena (#103) had a crush on Hemi’s brother – who never got the hint. Luana’s father was a minister and on occasion, to his dismay, Hemi found himself dragged to church with them, usually taking the opportunity to catch up on some sleep. These days Luana teaches at the same school as Hemi’s wife, and is exasperated by a new generation of “Hemis” – in every class, there’s always one… three in hers!
First appeared: 2000 #001

Clifford
Hemi’s best mate in school, often sporting a baseball cap. He shared Hemi’s sense of humour, particularly when the girls were the butt of the joke. With both his father, and an older brother (neither of whom he’d previously met) behind bars, Clifford had a gruff exterior that belied his soft spots – particularly for his tiny dog that Hemi and Luana loved to tease him about. Inspired by a dog house he built when he was 12, Clifford’s now an architect and lives in the city. The only bars he’s found himself behind are two he co-owns with his soon-to-be husband, and his brother-in-law. Clifford and Hemi catch up in the holidays to fish or hit the slopes – with varying degrees of success.
First appeared: 2000 #004

Hoani
Hemi’s older brother still sports a striped rugby jersey but has never actually played. His trademarks were his backwards cap and shades – along with failed attempts to impress women – either at the beach, during a short stint as a catalogue model, or from the drive-thru window where he worked in his last year of High School. He was essentially clueless when it came to the opposite sex, but somehow, miraculously found one who’d take him on. The couple now have an eight year-old daughter.
First appeared: 2000 #006

Mona
When Mona arrived on the scene as the new girl in school, Luana made a new best friend, and the pair evened the playing field, making the boys the butt of their jokes. Mona was a tom-boy who loved rugby, and had a crush on Hemi at first-sight, but  which faded naturally, to her relief. She’s the youngest of eight siblings, and the only girl! These days, she’s the captain of her local rugby team, a keen boxer and a pig-hunter who has yet to find a man tough enough to take her on.
First appeared: 2000 #033

The Warrior (Maori Super Hero/Imaginary Friend)
The Warrior started out as a cartoon character who Hemi devised for a school project. Designed as a more of a super-hero than an actual Maori warrior, he was largely ineffective in actually saving anybody – usually distracted by all the same things Hemi was… food, television and video games. He became an imaginary companion for Hemi, who would picture him performing all the chores he didn’t want to do such as carrying schoolbooks and cleaning his room. Just who he is and whether or not he truly exists outside of Hemi’s head isn’t really clear, but he appears now with Hemi’s kids, like a toy that’s been passed down from father to sons.
First appeared: 2000 #014

Fabian
Mona’s eldest brother and a hairdresser, Fabian was the only person who understood instinctively, that cutting Hemi’s hair took all of four seconds. He and his wife Denise (#045) an accountant, welcomed their first daughter Vaani (#118) into the world.
First appeared 2000 #036

Kahu
Clifford first met his wayward older brother when he showed up suddenly fresh out of prison. He hadn’t been behind bars the whole time, nobody really knows where he’d been until then, or where he still disappears to for months on end. He builds cars from parts he claims ‘come cheap’ which he takes for a spin into the city, and finds his brother to get petrol money for the trip home. It’s a small price to pay to see the back of him.
First appeared 2001 #273

Cousins
2000, 2001: Hemi and Hoani would catch up with their cousins every year around Easter, and sometimes for working bees at Labour Weekend if they’d been roped into it by their mother. Twins Damian and Rewi, keen musicians and beach-bums (#065, #073), Max, Hemi’s double in every respect except the long hair (#064),  Emma, Damian and Rewi’s sister who manages to keep them in line (#066), Bubs – the baby of the family whom everyone would try to avoid babysitting (#070) and Eruera, a walking tower and forestry worker who’s neck was thicker than most of the tree trunks he’d fell with his bare hands.

Mona’s brothers
2000,2001: Ski instructor Quinn, always chased by women spent his time chasing men (#104), Twins Ramon and Sasha (#163), Noveau-Bohemian Kane resides in London where he paints theatre props and dreams of one day saving the world (#167), basketballer Teo (#173), and Tyler, who flatted with Hoani and fellow roommate Monique fresh out of High School (#165)

Classic miscellaneous characters:

Jackson
Hoani’s best friend, nicknamed ‘Jackson’ for the afro he eventually had to cut in order to fit through doors
First appeared 2000 #008

Gloria
Owns the salon where Fabian worked. The town oracle dishing out advice to everybody she’d call her ‘darling’ or ‘honey’.
First appeared 2000 #087

Levi
Farmhand on Hemi’s uncle’s farm
First appeared 2001 #225

Monique
Rommate of Hoani and Tyler
First appeared 2001 #170

Jason and Milo
Single Dad Jason and sister Teresa moved into the neighbourhood, where Erena, Luana’s sister, would try to impress him by babysitting his son Milo – much to her Friend Tuli’s dismay.
First appeared #315